What you've done
by Rough Prologue
Summary: "You left her there. You ran and you left her with almost nothing. She would have followed you, had you asked. Would have went with you without so much as a backward glance. You had to have known that she would have followed you to the ends of the earth - all you had to do was ask." - This is my take on how Sui-Feng spent the years after Yoruichi left. One-shot - update:not anymore
1. Chapter 1

Keep in mind that this story is done from _my_ point of view. That is, from an OC's point of view. This is my take on how Sui-Feng felt and thought and what she did when Yoruichi left. I have a lot of feels for this one, so I hope you like it too. I accept criticism, but flamers are just useless to me.

 **WARNING** : Contains mild swearing, angst and has a lesbian theme. If you don't like that sort of thing, don't read it.

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You left her there. You ran and you left her with almost _nothing._ She would have followed you, had you asked. Would have went with you without so much as a backward glance. You had to have known that she would have followed you to the ends of the earth - all you had to do was _ask_.

But you didn't.

And she was left alone to wallow in her sorrow and confusion for a hundred years. She believed that _you_ \- her center, her entire _universe_ \- had betrayed her. That you lied to her and that you used her like a _toy_. Can you imagine the kind of scar that leaves? Do you have any idea what you've done to her?

A weaker person would have shattered under the pressure to be smarter, stronger - _faster_. A smaller heart would have burst with the feelings of hurt, betrayal, loneliness and the - whywhy _why?!_ \- but she was strong. She was stronger than you ever thought she was and she persevered - she survived and picked up the pieces of her life as best as she could.

Yet you mock her, battle her all the while thinking that she was okay, that she was doing just _fine_ on her own.

No.

She was not okay, she most definitely was not _fine_. Her life went up in flames the moment you disappeared without a word. She didn't even have time to properly grieve for the empty spot in her heart before she had to step in and pick up the pieces of the scattered division _you_ left behind.

And _god_ she was just so _lost_ and _alone_ and all she could think was: I can' t do this I _can't - why did she leave I thought she loved me whywhywhywhy_

Then she tried to forget. She tried to forget your joyful laughs, tried to erase the way you smelled like honey and fresh grass, the way your mouth would curve at the edges in a sweet smile that was for her eyes and for her eyes only.

But everywhere she looked she saw an afterimage of you. Every time she used flash step, she would remember your proud smile and every move she made in battle echoed a little bit of you.

She worked herself to the ground in order to please her superiors. For years the only thing she thought and did was _traintraintraintrain_. It kept her mind occupied but it failed to please her aching heart.

After 50 years of forgetting and training nearly half of her heart was gone. And all throughout this, she had to become the ideal captain, the one her entire division looked to for orders and guidance and advice and _she couldn't do this anymore._

Then, when she was at the bottom of her sorrow, when she couldn't breathe from the pressure of being everything you should have been - she stopped and she realized that you just didn't care.

That you wouldn't come at the last second just as she was shattering to help her come back in one piece. She realized that she had to go on by herself, that she had to pick _herself_ back up or else no one would.

And she _raged_ at the thought that her god, her captain, friend and goddamn _lover_ didn't care about her and was out hiding and slithering around the human world like a fucking _snake._

And she would not stand for it. She would not be the plaything that you discarded like a boring well used toy. She would not be victim to your machinations. She _will not_ continue to wallow in sorrow like some fucking _weakling_.

The hate obliterated everything except the drive to become _strong_ \- stronger than _you_ ever were. The absolute loathing she developed just for you had tainted every memory she had of you, it ruined any lingering love she still held onto.

After this, she began to train like she never had before. She changed her fighting style so that it wouldn't resemble yours in the slightest. She followed the rules to a fucking T, she went to every meeting, she did all the goddamn paperwork, she trained her squad - all for the sake of becoming better, all so she could be better than _you_.

She did all of it in the hopes that the pain and longing in her heart would disappear along with her weaknesses. She'd hoped that by becoming better, she would rise up above you and forget what she'd been trying to for a long time.

She **_had_** to forget how much she _loved_ and _needed_ you or she would go **_insane_**.

Now do you realize what you've done? How much you've destroyed simply by not asking a simple question,

 _"Will you come with me, Suì-Fēng?"_

Honestly, I think you screwed up royally. You're just lucky that Suì-Fēng was a genuinely strong person and that she could survive that and more. But for your sake, I hope you realize the damage you've done.

But no matter. My opinion will hardly mean anything now will it? When all is said and done, it isn't any of _my_ business, is it?

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Please leave a review on you're way out, thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

This time it's Yoruichi POV. Enjoy! The **WARNINGS** are the same as the previous chapter, only brief mentions of sex in this one - _very_ brief.

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The first thing she thought when she met Suí Fēng at that training ground was, _"Sloppy"_ quickly followed by _"Cute"_.

She'd been walking around the grounds in circles, completely bored and hoping for some entertainment. So when the distant sounds of a battle reached her ears, she didn't even think as she flash stepped and kicked the ones whose reitastu felt malicious from the determined one. She didn't even care who's fight she was intruding on, she just wanted to _do_ something except sitting or throwing orders around or talking circles around fucking _politicians._

Sometimes she hated her family for being one of the four noble houses. But, such was the afterlife.

Effortlessly, she twisted away from the punch aimed at the base of her spine and delivered a reitastu infused kick to the bastard's ribs, punching his face for good measure. Another one was trying to sneak up to her from her blind spot - as if she had one - and before he could snap her slender neck in two, she dropped down to the ground and swept his feet right under him, jumping up to bash his head in the ground. Not enough for any _real_ damage but still enough to knock him out.

All of this happened in under 3 seconds. After she was done, she gracefully patted the imaginary dust off her uniform and faced the one they were all attack - er, training. Yes, let's call that training. Quick as lightning, she jumped at her, using her legs to twist her neck and throw her to the left. Watching as the trainee deftly flipped in midair to land in a kneel in front of her, Yoruichi really wished she could see the face of the petite girl - if only to see the blush she was sure was residing on her mask covered cheeks. She analyzed her reitastu out of curiosity - embarrassment, quickly followed by an astounding amount of admiration. Jeez, even her other servants - ahem, _comrades_ had at least a little bit of despise huddled under all of that god-like worship.

This one had no negative emotions towards her _at all_. This was...unusual. Okay, it was more like abnormal and it set her on her guard like nothing else did. So she barked at the kneeling girl with her (as Kisuke liked to call) 'obey me or die' voice.

"You there, what's your name?"

"My...name?" The poor girl was completely bewildered. It was like no one ever asked for her name before..."My name is Suí Fēng, commander." Follow the wind, huh? Not a bad name by her standards. She once knew a guy named Gomibako - which meant _trash can_ , honestly, of all the things to name your child...

But she was getting off topic here. The newly named Suí Fēng didn't seem like a threat at all. Kisuke's paranoia was rubbing off on her a little too much for comfort. Maybe she should hit his jaw extra hard in their next training session? Yes, that would do.

Now amused, she simply said, "Not bad" but didn't mention the fact that her form was sloppy or that she left too many openings to hit. Swiftly turning around to continue her trek through Sereitei, she contemplated on her new findings. If her estimations were correct - and they always were - Suí Fēng should rise through the ranks pretty fast and join her personal guard. It would certainly be fun, since teasing her lifeless guards was about the same as talking to a brick wall.

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Surprise, surprise, she made it! Finally, she could have some fun. While walking down the hallway that led to her private chambers, she spied the petite girl standing with her head down among her private guards. Oh, she couldn't have that, no sir! No way is she letting the fiery girl become the statues she was surrounded with! Unacceptable!

"Hello there, Suí Fēng." She chirped happily, smiling as her bowed head snapped up at being directly addressed. "Are you getting used to your role here with the force?" Her face was full of wonder and awe for a moment, before she seemed to collect herself slightly, bowing her head again. "Y-Yes commander, I am!" Yoruichi frowned at the 'commander' bit, that wouldn't do. Smiling a bit, she admonished, "I thought we were already on first name terms, _Suí Fēng._ " She purred at the name, smile widening as she saw her face redden to the shade of a tomato. Suí Fēng seemed to deflate a bit, and smiled up at Yoruichi sweetly, "Of course...I forgot, Lady Yoruichi." Fighting down a blush herself at sight of that cute face smiling so sweetly, Yoruichi almost scowled. Yoruichi Shihouin did _not_ blush! Even if she was looking at something so cute... _no no no, don't go there_ , she thought.

Still, _Lady_ Yoruichi? Well, she said her name, at least. She needed to think of something to loosen the girl up...hm. Yes that would do. Inwardly smirking at her idea, she started making buzzing noises.

"What is that I hear? Buzz-buzz, buzz-buzz." She mimed looking for the imaginary bee, but put her hand on Suí Fēng's head instead, "Aha! Thought it was a bee, but it was just all of those thoughts inside your head." Gently, she moved her hand through her hair, marveling at the soft tresses. Grinning at the shocked look on her upturned face, Yoruichi skipped past happily, "C'mon, follow me!" She stopped halfway down the hall when she didn't sense her reitatsu behind her. Suí Fēng was standing at the same spot, frozen with a hand on her head. "When I tell you to come with me, I expect you to run and run fast."

"Y-Yes Lady Yoruichi!" Sprinting, she stopped in front of her in a military stance, but looked up at her instead of bowing her head. She couldn't resist, so Yoruichi petted Suí Fēng's head again, grinning with genuine joy in her expression. "You'll be fine." She said this softly, for only Suí Fēng to hear.

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She didn't know it then, but that was when she first fell in love with Suí Fēng, her little bee. And when they shared their first kiss under the willow tree in her private gardens - Yoruichi a bit unsure, while Suí Fēng kept pressing her lips to hers harder, tugging the capitan closer - she would not stop thanking the Soul King for giving her this incredible creature to love. And when they went to bed together, when she got to hear her little bee moan and scream out her name while she writhed in ecstasy, she wondered, not for the first time, if she was deserving of this - if she did enough good in her long life to atone this heaven she was in. But when Suí Fēng, completely exhausted, kissed her slowly - _lovingly_ \- and snuggled into her, she found that she didn't _care_. She _dared_ anyone to stare at Suí Fēng's flushed, sleeping face and think differently. She was her comrade, her best friend and her _lover_.

Yoruichi vowed that night that she would forever protect what's _hers_ , promised herself that she would always be there for Suí Fēng - that she would stay with her _forever_.

* * *

Everything happened so _fast_. She didn't even have time to _think_ about Suí Fēng. But when she dropped off the last of the capitans in the secret training ground for Kisuke, her spirit started crying for what she'd done. She touched her wet cheeks with wonder, feeling her heart throb and her body shake with such utter _despair_ and _oh god I can't breathe_. She fell down on her knees, her legs failing to keep her upright unlike so many times before. Her soul quaked under the weight of her sorrow, shaking, writhing, _cracking_ and it almost shattered. But she reminded herself that she had a _mission_ to do.

Suí Fēng or Soul Society - no, the world? Because she _knew_ Kisuke. She knew what great things he would do in the future. Knew that he was _important_.

Her lover or the world? She was selfish, Yoruichi knew that. She knew she would have chosen the love of her life over the world in a heartbeat - wouldn't hesitate to let the world _burn_ \- as long as she had her little bee, everything would be _fine_.

In any other situation, it would have gone this way. But if the world burned, Suí Fēng would burn along with it. So. She picked herself up on shaky legs and wiped her cheeks. With hardened eyes and a broken soul, she ran.

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Thank you for reading! Leave a review on your way out, thanks!


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